exploring tourette syndrome with analog photography

I live with Tourette syndrome, a neurological disorder involving unwanted, repetitive movements or sounds called tics. My tics include facial grimacing, blinking, tensing of my throat, hands, and upper body. They occur all day, every day, intruding upon my daily life. A lack of understanding about Tourette’s and how that informs the way others see me has long affected the way I see and feel about myself.

In this series, I use an analog camera called a Diana F+. This plastic-bodied toy camera, with its limited controls, allows me to reenact my relationship with Tourette’s through photography. I tense and blink my eyes repeatedly, much like the shutter of a camera. I feel as if I spend most of my life with my eyes closed. This toy camera does not behave perfectly, the same way my body and mind does not behave perfectly. With this series, I seek to reveal that while the physical experiences of those with Tourette’s are unique, the emotions of shame, loneliness and misunderstanding are universal.